Just found this saved in my drafts folder from over a year ago...
A few weeks ago, the played a video at church with clips of 2-5th graders talking about how they hear from God. There was no question or hesitation in their answers. The answers varied from worship, read the Bible, through others, answered prayer and even just in being, but they all heard God’s voice.
I started crying because it was such a beautiful moment in hearing that these KIDS believe that God is real. It was incredibly humbling to know that many of these kids are so much farther along than I am in understand God’s voice.
I struggle with the question, Do I hear God’s voice? Do I even know God’s voice?
I have learned so much this summer. I think for the first time, I have felt the tension of living in two worlds. I have felt the incredibly strong pull of my earthly desires, but at the same time, the pull for ‘that which Christ has called me heavenward’. My life group has had the opportunity to become friends with some people at a homeless shelter. Do I spend more time with them, or do I go home watch my favorite show and get to bed early. Do I buy that shirt that I really do not need, or do I use that money to bless someone else. So many LGs were spent talking about having boldness and confidence is sharing the gospel.
Since Brazil last summer, I have had this tug on my heart. I continued to pray that God would make that clear to me. Months pass. The tug is still there. I have no idea what the tug is all about. Missions maybe, a few people told me they see me doing that. I started reading more blogs and hearing more stories of adoptions. There is that tug again. God’s heart is for caring for the orphans right? These things move me. I love hearing how people are willing to let go of themselves and jump into what God is calling them towards whether that be proclaiming the gospel here and abroad or adopting a child.
So I decide to apply for a missions trip with RH. There were only two coming up and one of the deadlines already passes…for the trip I was most interested in. The other deadline is a week away. I cant make that decision in one week. I pray about it, I still don’t do anything. The second deadline has now passed.
I come to the conclusion that I need to start walking. I spend so much time waiting around for life to fall into my lap. I just need to go and trust that God will direct my steps. The following Monday, I got an email saying the deadline has been extended.
Ok God is you? That afternoon I get in the car and there is a song on the radio with words saying “When you take that first step into the unknown, He wont let you go, So what are you waiting for. I turned my application in a few days later.
Going on this trip would require money I don’t have and don’t want to give up; vacation time I don’t have (again the money) and I would miss some events I wanted to be apart of. The more I process it, the more I realize I am in that tension of these two worlds again. Wont God provide? Isnt He worth it?
I cant not go after everything I learned this summer. I would be like ignoring all of it. I felt as if God was asking me to go on this trip.
So I wait to hear back if I am on the team. The more time passes, the more I begin to feel unqualified for this trip, the more I remind myself that if God is calling me to this, he will equip me. I then get the phone call saying we want a small team, maybe you can come on the Summer trip.
Honestly, part of me is relieved. The other part is upset and confused. Wasn’t this what God was asking of me? Didn’t I do it? I think what really got me was the fact that maybe I didn’t actually hear God….when this whole time I was convinced I did.
On Sunday, when Steve was talking about the future of RH Fullerton, he said something that stuck a cord with me. His vision for what this campus would look like was dead, but that doesn’t mean the vision itself was. God had other plans with the same components, it just looked differently. The tug is still there. Maybe it will just look differently in the way it plays out.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
More.
It feels like it has been one thing after another the last several weeks. I keep wondering when it will end. But at the same time, I am grieving the ending of this season of life (and fighting it a bit, I think). I was looking at the website of one of the speakers that will be at a leadership conference I am attending. On his blog he wrote, "I hate endings, no matter how “good” or celebrated they are. I associate endings with hurt. Hurt is the only word I seem to be able to come up with. Pain that doesn’t yet have an adjective. It just…hurts. I know I should be happy, I know an ending can be positive, my faith is clear it will all work out. But tonight, endings just feel like hurt. Hurt sounds like a little kid word. That feels like truth to me. Endings, while the transactional reality can be planned for, the emotion still strikes like a blow in the dark. I knew this day was coming. I’ve actually known from the beginning...".
That struck a cord with me. Hurt. I am hurting. I am hurting the loss of what has been an incredible chapter in my life. It has been one of stability and blessings. I have actually lived in one apartment for almost 2 years. I am completing five years at my job. My church just celebrated its two year birthday and I have been fortunate to be there from the beginning. RHF has become my home, my family. I have been able to pay off my student loans. I purchased my first car (yay for loans...again!). I had the ability to travel to Brazil, France, Canada and Israel. My life was normal. My life was predictable. I was set in my ways.
Several months ago, I knew I had entered a season of waiting. The only thing I knew I was waiting for was changes. If that was supposed to be a time of preperation as well, I failed! Because I would now say I have come into the a time of refining. And I only wish I was better prepared for this. I knew it was coming...at least I thought I did. Maybe I had hoped that things wouldnt change too drastically; that I would still have my safe, predictable life. I still dont know what this phase or the next will look like. Maybe the only thing that will be different is my heart. All I know is it hurts right now. A lot. It feels like God is stripping everything away. Everything that I found security in (apart from him). Everything that was my constant: my roommate, my apartment, my job.
I do have moments (few and far between) where I can finally get over myself and see the bigger picture. I just thought of the pain of childbirth, not that I have ever experience that. But I always hear about the excruciating, 'kill me now'pain that comes with child birth. But at the end (there is always an end to the pain) there is a blessing of a new baby. More often than not, I hear mothers say they would go through it all again for that child. I wonder how many would say that when they are in their twelfth hour of labor. I guess the point it is that the pain is necessary. For one, it is a reminder of how broken and sinful and desperatly I am in need of God to strip my heart of its uncleanness. But if we skip out on the pain, we miss the reward that is at the end of it all.
I dont know what God is doing. I wish he would clue me in on it just a little bit. Beacuse this sucks. And at times, I think He has, but the reality of that might scare me even more. Its so much easier to deal with pain and hurt when you know why. But I want what comes at the end. If I believe that my God is good and his plans are good, then I need this! There is more,whatever that may be, waiting at the end. He wants to give more. Lord, Give me more.
That struck a cord with me. Hurt. I am hurting. I am hurting the loss of what has been an incredible chapter in my life. It has been one of stability and blessings. I have actually lived in one apartment for almost 2 years. I am completing five years at my job. My church just celebrated its two year birthday and I have been fortunate to be there from the beginning. RHF has become my home, my family. I have been able to pay off my student loans. I purchased my first car (yay for loans...again!). I had the ability to travel to Brazil, France, Canada and Israel. My life was normal. My life was predictable. I was set in my ways.
Several months ago, I knew I had entered a season of waiting. The only thing I knew I was waiting for was changes. If that was supposed to be a time of preperation as well, I failed! Because I would now say I have come into the a time of refining. And I only wish I was better prepared for this. I knew it was coming...at least I thought I did. Maybe I had hoped that things wouldnt change too drastically; that I would still have my safe, predictable life. I still dont know what this phase or the next will look like. Maybe the only thing that will be different is my heart. All I know is it hurts right now. A lot. It feels like God is stripping everything away. Everything that I found security in (apart from him). Everything that was my constant: my roommate, my apartment, my job.
I do have moments (few and far between) where I can finally get over myself and see the bigger picture. I just thought of the pain of childbirth, not that I have ever experience that. But I always hear about the excruciating, 'kill me now'pain that comes with child birth. But at the end (there is always an end to the pain) there is a blessing of a new baby. More often than not, I hear mothers say they would go through it all again for that child. I wonder how many would say that when they are in their twelfth hour of labor. I guess the point it is that the pain is necessary. For one, it is a reminder of how broken and sinful and desperatly I am in need of God to strip my heart of its uncleanness. But if we skip out on the pain, we miss the reward that is at the end of it all.
I dont know what God is doing. I wish he would clue me in on it just a little bit. Beacuse this sucks. And at times, I think He has, but the reality of that might scare me even more. Its so much easier to deal with pain and hurt when you know why. But I want what comes at the end. If I believe that my God is good and his plans are good, then I need this! There is more,whatever that may be, waiting at the end. He wants to give more. Lord, Give me more.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Sunday is Coming!
It has been about a year and a half since I even looked at this blog. But recently something inside me desired to start writing in this again. Life is a funny thing. I just read over my last post and much has happened since then.
Much has transpired in the last month even. If you would have asked me five weeks ago what I thought life would look like next month, it would have involved a new job, new city, new life. A month from now, I will be in a 'new' city, with a 'new' life and quite possible a 'new' job. But it is a far cry from what I imagined it would be. And something inside me still thinks much 'newness' is still coming.
I wonder what God must think when He sees me. One day I am confident that God is guiding and directing my steps; I am filled with peace. Then literally the next day all of that is replace with confusion, frustration and 'What the hell are you doing God'. Oh, how quickly things change.
Easter just passed. Honestly, Easter has always been just another holiday. Growing up I am pretty sure I looked forward to the Spring Celebration that was held at the France Ranch more than Easter Sunday! Sure my parents made sure we knew the true meaning of this day, But when faced with sitting still to listen to the story of how Christ died on the cross for our sins, rose three days later, conquering death so we can have eternal life, while there were eggs filled with glorious candy (not to mention the 'golden egg', that we three were never allowed to find because we were the hosts...whatever...) taunting us just out the door, we all know were our minds were. And even though the Spring Celebration parties stopped many years ago, my mind was still there.
This week leading up to Easter was a profound time for me...and how easily I forget it, too. Palm Sunday, I was reminded of the now and not yet. We are living in light of eternity. What we see now is just a shadow of what is to come. The beauty of this world doesnt even compare to what is to come. The love we experience is just a shadow of what is to come. All that is broken, will be made new. All that is cursed, will be blessed. I am just a small part of the bigger story that God has been writing since the beginning of time. I was written with a purpose. The Author wrote my story for a reason. I have a role to play. And even though I have a hard time seeing past the crappiness of life I find myself in, it is pretty insignificant in light of the whole story, the bigger story. But even in that, the Author still cares about me. I am sure one day I will look back and see this time of life as one of those 'exciting twists and turns' that make for a good story. Or maybe this is a crucial turning point that must happen before the next chapter can be written.
Good Friday. The time where we are forced to sit in the reality of death, evil, our sins. My sin. My sin that I so easily justify. My sin that I blame everyone else for, but me. My brokeness that led Christ to the cross. Jesus died.
Saturday. Jesus is in the tomb. I spent this day being hurt, unintentionally by someone close to me; reminding me of the uncertainty, confusion and frustration of where I am at. I saw someone post on facebook, "Holy Saturday is an uncomfortable place of waiting, confusion and wondering how God could ever redeem this. Sunday always comes."
Sunday is here. Sunday is now. Sunday is everyday. Christ has risen. I have nothing to fear. He is making all things new. If I would just look, I could see glimpses of God is redeeming his creation all around me. For the first time, I had a desire and even a longing to celebrate. To celebrate more than just candy. My pastor always says, 'We are Easter people living in a good Friday world'. I have been looking at my life asking What the heck! But Sunday is coming. He will make all things new. Learning to trust in the one who had conqured death for me; the one who will fight for me.
Much has transpired in the last month even. If you would have asked me five weeks ago what I thought life would look like next month, it would have involved a new job, new city, new life. A month from now, I will be in a 'new' city, with a 'new' life and quite possible a 'new' job. But it is a far cry from what I imagined it would be. And something inside me still thinks much 'newness' is still coming.
I wonder what God must think when He sees me. One day I am confident that God is guiding and directing my steps; I am filled with peace. Then literally the next day all of that is replace with confusion, frustration and 'What the hell are you doing God'. Oh, how quickly things change.
Easter just passed. Honestly, Easter has always been just another holiday. Growing up I am pretty sure I looked forward to the Spring Celebration that was held at the France Ranch more than Easter Sunday! Sure my parents made sure we knew the true meaning of this day, But when faced with sitting still to listen to the story of how Christ died on the cross for our sins, rose three days later, conquering death so we can have eternal life, while there were eggs filled with glorious candy (not to mention the 'golden egg', that we three were never allowed to find because we were the hosts...whatever...) taunting us just out the door, we all know were our minds were. And even though the Spring Celebration parties stopped many years ago, my mind was still there.
This week leading up to Easter was a profound time for me...and how easily I forget it, too. Palm Sunday, I was reminded of the now and not yet. We are living in light of eternity. What we see now is just a shadow of what is to come. The beauty of this world doesnt even compare to what is to come. The love we experience is just a shadow of what is to come. All that is broken, will be made new. All that is cursed, will be blessed. I am just a small part of the bigger story that God has been writing since the beginning of time. I was written with a purpose. The Author wrote my story for a reason. I have a role to play. And even though I have a hard time seeing past the crappiness of life I find myself in, it is pretty insignificant in light of the whole story, the bigger story. But even in that, the Author still cares about me. I am sure one day I will look back and see this time of life as one of those 'exciting twists and turns' that make for a good story. Or maybe this is a crucial turning point that must happen before the next chapter can be written.
Good Friday. The time where we are forced to sit in the reality of death, evil, our sins. My sin. My sin that I so easily justify. My sin that I blame everyone else for, but me. My brokeness that led Christ to the cross. Jesus died.
Saturday. Jesus is in the tomb. I spent this day being hurt, unintentionally by someone close to me; reminding me of the uncertainty, confusion and frustration of where I am at. I saw someone post on facebook, "Holy Saturday is an uncomfortable place of waiting, confusion and wondering how God could ever redeem this. Sunday always comes."
Sunday is here. Sunday is now. Sunday is everyday. Christ has risen. I have nothing to fear. He is making all things new. If I would just look, I could see glimpses of God is redeeming his creation all around me. For the first time, I had a desire and even a longing to celebrate. To celebrate more than just candy. My pastor always says, 'We are Easter people living in a good Friday world'. I have been looking at my life asking What the heck! But Sunday is coming. He will make all things new. Learning to trust in the one who had conqured death for me; the one who will fight for me.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Time flies, whether your having fun or not!
It’s been over a year since I left for Brazil. In some ways that seems like ages ago, in others it seems like it was yesterday. There was something about that trip that has made it become a marker in the timeline of Andrea’s life. Just like graduating from high school or college or starting my first job, going to Brazil in July of 2009 marked something in my life. I’m just not quite sure what that is. That trip was unlike any of the others I have been on. Again, I don’t know if I could put into words what made it different. Maybe part of it was because of the relationships I made with the students and leaders on our team. Another part might be seeing the Spirit of God work like I have never before seen. Or maybe it was certain questions and thoughts that were spoken to me, that I still can’t fully answer. I am sure it was a combination of things that left me not wanting to leave (a first!). I boarded that plane, in tears, unsure of all of these things going on in my heart.
I arrived home to a different apartment. It was the same complex, same size, same floor plan, and even had the furniture in the same place, the only new part was that it was on the other side of the complex. This perfectly described what I was feeling. I was coming home to the same life I had when I left. Yet it was different. Everything is the same, yet still different.
My goal after arriving back home was to continue to discover what God was doing in my heart as well as answer the questions posed to me. As time went on, the novelty of it wore off. The ‘high’ was gone. And here we are, a year later and I have to ask myself, “What have you done all year?” My first reaction is always the same. Nothing! I’ve done nothing with my life.
But as I look back, life isn’t necessarily the same anymore. In the past year, I have traveled to three countries: Brazil, Canada, and France. I have completed three years at ACSI. I have been able to play a part in the launch of RH Fullerton though prayer nights and the greeting team and have found a church home. I’ve led a life group for 2.5 years and have watched my group (as well as myself) change and grow. In the last year, I trained (if you could call it that) and ran a 5K. I’ve learned a lot about myself, good and bad.
And while I can see that I have actually done something, I have to ask myself, does it matter? Do these things have an eternal significance? What have I done that will matter in eternity? I’ve been really convicted lately with the amount of time, money etc that I spend on me and what I want and what makes me comfortable. What else are we here for other than to share Jesus? I don’t want to look back on this next year and see that I have done all of these amazing things, but in the end, it has no significance.
I want to be apart of the revolution Jesus is inviting us to play a part in. I want to do something that matters. I don’t want to do what is comfortable. And as hard as it is to even type out I want to trust Him so completely that I am unafraid to put myself in situations where I will be in trouble if He doesn't come through.
I arrived home to a different apartment. It was the same complex, same size, same floor plan, and even had the furniture in the same place, the only new part was that it was on the other side of the complex. This perfectly described what I was feeling. I was coming home to the same life I had when I left. Yet it was different. Everything is the same, yet still different.
My goal after arriving back home was to continue to discover what God was doing in my heart as well as answer the questions posed to me. As time went on, the novelty of it wore off. The ‘high’ was gone. And here we are, a year later and I have to ask myself, “What have you done all year?” My first reaction is always the same. Nothing! I’ve done nothing with my life.
But as I look back, life isn’t necessarily the same anymore. In the past year, I have traveled to three countries: Brazil, Canada, and France. I have completed three years at ACSI. I have been able to play a part in the launch of RH Fullerton though prayer nights and the greeting team and have found a church home. I’ve led a life group for 2.5 years and have watched my group (as well as myself) change and grow. In the last year, I trained (if you could call it that) and ran a 5K. I’ve learned a lot about myself, good and bad.
And while I can see that I have actually done something, I have to ask myself, does it matter? Do these things have an eternal significance? What have I done that will matter in eternity? I’ve been really convicted lately with the amount of time, money etc that I spend on me and what I want and what makes me comfortable. What else are we here for other than to share Jesus? I don’t want to look back on this next year and see that I have done all of these amazing things, but in the end, it has no significance.
I want to be apart of the revolution Jesus is inviting us to play a part in. I want to do something that matters. I don’t want to do what is comfortable. And as hard as it is to even type out I want to trust Him so completely that I am unafraid to put myself in situations where I will be in trouble if He doesn't come through.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Time to Wake Up!
Dreams are a funny thing. Not necessarily dream we have while sleeping, although mine are quite funny and out there, but dreams we have for what our lives will be like.
Ive had this one dream for as long as I can remember. It began when I was in preschool at church. And it has lasted these 20+ years. I will admit, the odds of this dream ever coming true were not in my favor. My senior year at Biola, I had a little glimmer of hope. I thought that this might be my moment to make this dream come true, or at least get the ball rolling again. Maybe not even get the ball rolling, but this glimmer of hope helped me see where the ball was. It was just a mirage. But I held on to the little hope that I had.
Well, last weekend, the dream ended. There is NO possibility of it ever coming true. Truthfully, I never thought it would come true...I don’t think I would ever want it to come true. It was more of a fun little story that I could tell people. The funny thing is, I am kind of sad.
I think about all of the dreams I’ve had over the last 25 years. What dreams have I ignored? What dreams have I foolishly spent too much time and effort thinking about? What dreams have I let pass me by or felt unqualified for in some way? Which ones were of my own efforts of creating the life I wanted?
I want another dream (or even dreams). A God given dream. A dream He has given me, because it is something He has for me or wants me to do. A dream that will become reality because, after all, it isn’t mine, but His.
Ive had this one dream for as long as I can remember. It began when I was in preschool at church. And it has lasted these 20+ years. I will admit, the odds of this dream ever coming true were not in my favor. My senior year at Biola, I had a little glimmer of hope. I thought that this might be my moment to make this dream come true, or at least get the ball rolling again. Maybe not even get the ball rolling, but this glimmer of hope helped me see where the ball was. It was just a mirage. But I held on to the little hope that I had.
Well, last weekend, the dream ended. There is NO possibility of it ever coming true. Truthfully, I never thought it would come true...I don’t think I would ever want it to come true. It was more of a fun little story that I could tell people. The funny thing is, I am kind of sad.
I think about all of the dreams I’ve had over the last 25 years. What dreams have I ignored? What dreams have I foolishly spent too much time and effort thinking about? What dreams have I let pass me by or felt unqualified for in some way? Which ones were of my own efforts of creating the life I wanted?
I want another dream (or even dreams). A God given dream. A dream He has given me, because it is something He has for me or wants me to do. A dream that will become reality because, after all, it isn’t mine, but His.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Brownies and Spaghetti Squash
I love food!
I love making it and I love eating it.
I enjoy browsing through my cookbooks looking for different recipes to try. There are a few things I will make over and over again, but most things I try, end up being a one shot deal. This is probably because of my lack of cooking/baking ability. Most recipes serve, at the minimum, four people. And while at times I might eat like I am four people, it's a little too much food for just me. I will usually cut the recipe in half. This wouldn’t be a problem for most people. However, I tend to forget half way though. The cake will end up with half the amount of flour and a full amount of sugar.
Even though my creations aren't anything to write home about (those that are, are sent via picture text message to mom!!), I still love the process. I get to make something delicious (hopefully) from several items that would be anything but delicious on their own.
Food is an incredible thing on many levels. The question was asked in my Life Group, "Where do you see God"? My answer at that moment was food. That answer received many laughs. I had this realization as I was in my kitchen cooking with spaghetti squash. I pulled out of the oven and cut it open. I soon had a pile of spaghetti like strands filling up the plate. And while you might be laughing at this as well, it was an AHA moment for me. God has given us all we need to nourish our bodies in the food he created. And its not just bland manna like food. He has given us food in all shapes, sizes, colors, textures, smells and tastes, each filled with vitamins, minerals and the nutrients needed to keep us alive.
Not only is he a creative God (have you seen spaghetti squash?!) but He is also one who loves to lavish his children with good things.
I also love food because it brings people together. When was the last time you were with a group of people and there was no food?
All of that to say, I have found the most amazing brownie recipe. This will not be going in the ‘tried and failed’ pile. In fact, I have made them three times in the last two weeks. They are full of rich, chocolaty goodness and even a hint of coffee flavor. They are super quick to make (and eat!). I have no desire to cut this recipe in half. I will gladly eat the whole pan!
THE MOST AMAZING BROWNIES
1 C Sugar
2 eggs
½ tsp vanilla extract
½ cup butter, melted
½ cup all purpose flour
1/3 cup baking cocoa
¼ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp salt
FROSTING:
3 tb baking cocoa
3 tb butter, melted
1 tsp instat coffee granuals
1 ½ cups confectioners sugar
2-3 tb warm water
In a large mixing bowl, beat sugar, eggs and vanilla. Add butter; mix well. Combine the flour, cocoa, baking powder and salt; add to batter and mix well.
Pour into a greased 8 in square baking pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 min.
For frosting, combine the cocoa, butter and coffee. Gradually stir in confectioners sugar and enough water to achieve a spreading consistency. Frost brownies.
I love making it and I love eating it.
I enjoy browsing through my cookbooks looking for different recipes to try. There are a few things I will make over and over again, but most things I try, end up being a one shot deal. This is probably because of my lack of cooking/baking ability. Most recipes serve, at the minimum, four people. And while at times I might eat like I am four people, it's a little too much food for just me. I will usually cut the recipe in half. This wouldn’t be a problem for most people. However, I tend to forget half way though. The cake will end up with half the amount of flour and a full amount of sugar.
Even though my creations aren't anything to write home about (those that are, are sent via picture text message to mom!!), I still love the process. I get to make something delicious (hopefully) from several items that would be anything but delicious on their own.
Food is an incredible thing on many levels. The question was asked in my Life Group, "Where do you see God"? My answer at that moment was food. That answer received many laughs. I had this realization as I was in my kitchen cooking with spaghetti squash. I pulled out of the oven and cut it open. I soon had a pile of spaghetti like strands filling up the plate. And while you might be laughing at this as well, it was an AHA moment for me. God has given us all we need to nourish our bodies in the food he created. And its not just bland manna like food. He has given us food in all shapes, sizes, colors, textures, smells and tastes, each filled with vitamins, minerals and the nutrients needed to keep us alive.
Not only is he a creative God (have you seen spaghetti squash?!) but He is also one who loves to lavish his children with good things.
I also love food because it brings people together. When was the last time you were with a group of people and there was no food?
All of that to say, I have found the most amazing brownie recipe. This will not be going in the ‘tried and failed’ pile. In fact, I have made them three times in the last two weeks. They are full of rich, chocolaty goodness and even a hint of coffee flavor. They are super quick to make (and eat!). I have no desire to cut this recipe in half. I will gladly eat the whole pan!
THE MOST AMAZING BROWNIES
1 C Sugar
2 eggs
½ tsp vanilla extract
½ cup butter, melted
½ cup all purpose flour
1/3 cup baking cocoa
¼ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp salt
FROSTING:
3 tb baking cocoa
3 tb butter, melted
1 tsp instat coffee granuals
1 ½ cups confectioners sugar
2-3 tb warm water
In a large mixing bowl, beat sugar, eggs and vanilla. Add butter; mix well. Combine the flour, cocoa, baking powder and salt; add to batter and mix well.
Pour into a greased 8 in square baking pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 min.
For frosting, combine the cocoa, butter and coffee. Gradually stir in confectioners sugar and enough water to achieve a spreading consistency. Frost brownies.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Becoming Who I Am
I love this phrase. 'Becoming Who We Are' was the title of a sermon series my church did. It has been on my mind a lot recently and I think I am just beginning to grasp what it means. I think the illustration of a husband/wife or mother/father best descibes this process. When you say 'I do', you become a husband/wife, but that is just the beginning. You then spend the rest of your life figuring out what that means. The same is with parents. When that little baby is born, ready or not, you are a mom/dad. In the same way, you spend the rest of your life figuring out what it means to be a parent.
I am a child of God. I am deeply loved. I am forgiven. I am new, the old is gone. I am in Christ. The list could go on. I am already all of these things. But I am just now learning what it means to live it out. I want to be able to sit in these truths, and belive at the core of my being they are true (They have to be. Jesus said so!) and boldly live who God says I am.
I wonder what our churches, neighborhoods, schools and even the world, would look like if we really truly believed that what scriptures says we are, is actually true!
I am a child of God. I am deeply loved. I am forgiven. I am new, the old is gone. I am in Christ. The list could go on. I am already all of these things. But I am just now learning what it means to live it out. I want to be able to sit in these truths, and belive at the core of my being they are true (They have to be. Jesus said so!) and boldly live who God says I am.
I wonder what our churches, neighborhoods, schools and even the world, would look like if we really truly believed that what scriptures says we are, is actually true!
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